a look back at 2008

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
marriage

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? i don't remember if i made any resolutions last year...i can't remember any in particular. for this year, although i hate to use the word resolution as it seems to doom you not to do what you plan, i'd say i'd like to continue to be healthier, eat better food, less laziness, and more blogging.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
yes! on december 7th, jennifer & jm welcomed baby kaya into this world. she's adorable!

4. Did anyone close to you die?
no which i am very thankful for.

5. What countries did you visit?
aruba!

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
clothes from anthropologie

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
guess i would have to go with that whole wedding thing for obvious reasons

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
successfully planned a ceremony & fabulous party for 100 people.

9. What was your biggest failure?
failure is a really harsh word. i don't know if i'd rank anything i've failed to do as a failure...unless someone would like to point something out to me.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
no, nothing serious.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
danny's wedding gift. a beautiful, warwick bass.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
scarlett

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
sarah palin

14. Where did most of your money go?
please see #5 and #7

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
lots of excitement this year...when my clothes were too big for me, wedding & all the family/friends/fun that came with it, honeymoon, marriage.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
golden by my morning jacket

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? happier
b) thinner or fatter? thinner
c) richer or poorer? richer (joint assets ;)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
reading. mountain biking.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
work

20. How did you spend Christmas?
danny and i went to cookeville & spent time with our families. we had a big christmas eve dinner at my parents' house with his parents & sister & brother-in-law and my family. it was wonderful! then we spent the rest of the time eating and sleeping.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
i fell in love with mighty leaf vanilla bean tea & bandito's fajitas and veggie taco salad.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
tough question...i'm not sure if i could pick just one...i guess my top 2 are the office & 30 rock

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
hate is a waste of time.

24. What was the best book you read?
the secret life of bees

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
over the rhine

26. What did you want and get?
an extremely happy year

27. What did you want and not get?
a part time job that pays me a full time salary

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
let the right one in

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
we have a lot of june birthdays: 13 - danny, 14 - me, 16 - andy, 17 - dave, 18 - stef. so every year we do a joint birthday celebration of some sort. this year we had a june birthday party (complete with ice cream cake) at drew & stef's. i turned 24.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
if the people i love lived closer to me

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
boho chic?

32. What kept you sane?
danny - he's very good at it.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
jeffrey dean morgan

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
gay rights. right to choose. the whole presidential race got me pretty stirred up.

35. Who did you miss?
papa

36. Who was the best new person you met?
kaya. she's definitely the newest person i've met.

37. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
Watchin' a stretch of road, miles of light explode.
Driftin' off a thing i'd never done before
Watchin' a crowd roll in. out go the lights it begins.
A feelin' in my bones i never felt before...
Mmm... people always told me. that bars are dark and lonely
And talk is often cheap and filled with air.
Sure sometimes they thrill me
But nothin' could ever chill me.
Like the way they make the time just disappear
Feelin' you are here again. hot on my skin again.
Feelin good a thing i'd never known beforeWhat does it mean to feel?
Millions of dreams come real
A feelin' in my soul i'd never felt before... mmm...
And you always told me.
No matter how long it holds me if it falls apart
Or makes us millonaires. you'll be right here forever.
We'll go thru this thing together
And on heaven's golden shore we'll lay our heads.

i am in awe

i have been out of town this week for business travel and then vacation, so i have had the chance to write about the political happenings of the week. i was going to post something the night of the election day, but i fell asleep watching cnn into the wee hours of the morning (yes, i am officially a news junkie). so, wow, i am in awe. despite the fact that i have been incredibly hopeful and the polls assured me i was right to be, i was still surprised when obama won. when things have been going the way they have for the last 8 years, you just get to expect to have the rug ripped out from under you whenever you start to feel like change might be coming. but, this time, change did happen. barack obama is our new president.



this is such an exciting time in our history. i had never been so excited to vote. i could actually feel the change when i voted. it is huge that we have finally elected our first black president, but i also think we have to make sure this doesn't turn into a completely racial thing. obama would have won even if he hadn't been black. he won because of his ideas and the change he represents. i am so proud of my country. we have embraced the future & i truly believe things are going to get better. america will be better.

there are still a couple issues that i do feel the need to address.

#1 - despite having an uncommon name, obama is an american citizen. believe it or not, someone's status message on facebook was calling this into question. this floored me; i thought i was missing out some joke. i wasn't. for the record, obama was born in hawaii which is a us state. in fact, he could not be elected president if he wasn't born in this country.

#2 - proposition 8 passed. other propositions banning same sex marriage were passed in other states this actually makes my heart hurt. these propositions are culminations of hate. HATE. why do people want to deprive people from their right to be happy? gay americans are entitled to equal rights as citizens of this country which means the right to marry whomever they chose. this is a constitutional issue. it IS unconstitutional to not allow gay citizens to get married. there is no question about it. none. your beliefs about whether being gay is a sin or not or if gay people make you uncomfortable is not the issue.

have we forgotten that fifty years ago it was illegal for blacks and whites to marry? this is the same kind of mistreatment. i hear people use the argument that if the majority of people believe in a ban, then that's what we should do, but they seem to have forgotten that it is the government's job to protect the rights of minority. 150 years ago slavery was legal & the majority of people in the country believed it was right. should we have therefore not had the emancipation proclamation? black people were treated like second class citizens and that is how the country is treating gay americans now. if they want to marry, f'in let them! it does not affect anyone else besides the two people entering into the marriage.






#3 - this is related to #2, but if i hear about protecting "traditional marriage" one more time, i'm going to throw up. protecting traditional marriage? really? do heterosexual couples really protect marriage and make it sacred? are they really such good examples? half the heterosexual couples who marry divorce. is that protecting it? if britney spears can get married, then why can't the gay couple who has been committed to one another for 50 years?

#4 - arkansas passed a proposition that denies the right to adopt to unmarried people. this prop was created to target same sex couples who wish to adopt and raise children. i actually heard the argument that gay people shouldn't get married because they shouldn't have children because a child has to have both a mother and a father. so, according to this argument, when a heterosexual couple divorces or a parent dies, we should take the children out of the home because they shouldn't be raised by only a mother or only a father. that is ridiculous. families come in all different sizes and shapes. a family is love, not specific roles for each member.

we have some work to do, but we're on the right track with a new president. we can do it, but we all have to work together. we are the united states of america.

one month!

believe it or not, today is our one month anniversary. danny and i have been married for exactly 30 days. it's hard to believe that much time has passed. of course, a week of it was spent on the honeymoon & the next week was spent adjusting to not being on a honeymoon anymore. it's been a very good 4 weeks & we're enjoying the whole husband/wife thing. :)



still no professional photos yet but hopefully soon!

i've got a new last name

i realize it has been weeks since my last post, but i had no idea how busy and exhuasting the weeks leading up to the wedding would be. i couldn't concentrate on anything. the only thing i could think about was what i needed to do before the wedding. but we survived with no major mishaps & i now have a new last name!

the wedding was fabulous. the ceremony was wonderful. i think we really succeeded in having a wedding and ceremony that was truly us. the entire weekend (starting thursday) was so much fun. it was amazing to have almost all the people i love and care about in one place at the same time celebrating our marriage. i mean, really amazing. everyone was there for us; everyone was willing to help and actually wanted to help. it was so sad on sunday when everyone had to go home...i've been trying to think of a way for everyone to live in one place, that place being wherever i happen to be. guess maybe i need to start a commune?

weddings are surrounded by so much love, and i just want to take a moment to thank everyone who helped with planning, setting up, crafting & assembly, moral support, time, thinking, food, wine, coordinating, baking, shopping, keeping me calm, and making sure we had the very best wedding weekend possible. thank you.

what if

borrowed: "whatever"

this is a post borrowed from a blog entitled whatever. it's long, but it's great.

a quick note published by john scalzi:

I have married eleven people. One of them I am married to; the other ten I have married to each other (two at a time). So I have some experience on the whole wedding and marriage thing. Please allow me the honor of sharing some of it with you.

Remember to breathe.

It’s all right if you stumble over words during the vows, but don’t screw up the name of your spouse.

If you feel yourself crying, go with it, but remember to sniffle strategically — tears are endearing in a wedding ceremony, a runny nose less so.

Don’t lock your knees.

The old saying that if the ring gets jammed as you slip it on it means it’ll be a troubled marriage is a contemptible lie, so don’t let it worry you. But strategic use of talcum powder wouldn’t hurt.

You will almost certainly have trouble focusing on anything but the face of your beloved during the ceremony; that’s why there’s a third person up there to direct traffic.

Even if you’ve written your own vows, you’ll barely remember what you say. So don’t sweat most of the words. It’s the “I do” that counts.

Speaking of which, I think it’s always better to say “I do” than “I will.” You’re going to be married in the future, but you’re getting married now.

But remember, it’s your wedding. Anyone else’s opinion about what the two of you should do or say during the ceremony is strictly advisory.

When you’re told to kiss your spouse, do it like you mean it.

Be aware that this last piece of advice will be almost entirely unnecessary.

When you plan your wedding, try to cover all contingencies. When the one thing you forgot could go wrong does go wrong during the wedding itself, accept it and keep going. Weddings are often imperfect, like the people in them. It doesn’t mean they’re not still absolutely wonderful (like the people within them).

Before the ceremony, pee early and often. I know. But look, you want to be up there with a full bladder? You’ll be nervous enough.

Some people don’t think you should invite your exes to the wedding. But I think it’s not such a bad thing to have one person in the crowd slightly depressed that they let you get away. They’ll get over it at the reception. Trust me.

There will not be nearly enough time at the reception to spend all the time you want with all the people you want to. They’ll understand and will be happy for the time you can spare them.

Smashing wedding cake into each other’s face is strictly amateur hour.

It’s your best man’s (or the equivalent’s) job to remind people that at a wedding reception, as at the Academy Awards, speeches are best very short. You didn’t spend an obscene amount on the catering just to have it grow cold as Uncle Jim blathers on.

Remind the DJ or band that they work for you, and they’ll damn well play anything you want. For some reason I think this may be less of a problem at gay weddings. Thank God.

There will be drama of some sort at the reception. If the wedding party lets any of it reach the newlyweds, they haven’t done their job.

Don’t fill up on bread. You’ll have to dance later.

The first dance should be a song people expect from you. The second dance should be a song they absolutely don’t. It gets things going.

Try to remember as much as you can. Don’t worry if you don’t; what you absolutely will remember is how it feels to be with those who love you, who are pouring their love and happiness over you. Weddings are testimony to your clan of family and friends. You put them on to give them a chance to share your joy. They come to them to remind you that they already do.

In case this is in any way an issue, let someone else clean up the reception hall. You have better things to do on your wedding night.

There are very few things in the world that are better than the very first time you wake up next your spouse.

In some ways, your marriage will be like every other marriage out there. In other ways, of course, it won’t. Those of us who are married now will certainly offer you advice, whether you ask for it or not. But there are some things where you’ll be the first married people to experience them. In some ways, those of us who are married now will be glad we don’t have to go through them. In other ways, we’re deeply envious.

Marriage is work. It never stops being work. It never should.

I’ve been married 13 years as of this very day. During all that time, there hasn’t been a single day where I haven’t said “I love you” to my spouse — several times if at all possible. The two facts are related.

Other short phrases which also occasionally come in handy: “I’m sorry,” “You’re right,” “I’ll get that” and “Of course I’ll go down to the freezer and get you some ice cream, even though it’s 3am and you woke me from a dead sleep. There’s nothing I’d rather do.” Okay, so that last one is not that short. Think about all the times you’re entirely unreasonable, and then go get the ice cream.

The thing about marriages — even the really good ones — is that human beings are in them. And you know how people are. Keep it in mind.

I have no advice to give you for the people who have decided that your marriage threatens their own. Only remember that some of us out here would wish to give you the strength to endure them.

I cannot speak for all married people, but I can speak for myself. Marriage has been so good to me that I cannot imagine not sharing it with anyone who wants it. I celebrate your weddings, and I offer the greatest gift I have: That you receive in your married life the joy I have had in mine, and that you share that joy, every day, with an open and loving heart. You’re about to be married. There is nothing better.

To those about to be married: Welcome, friends. It’s good to have you here.

the overturning of gay marriage ban

i can't go any longer without posting about the california supreme court's decision last week. i am THRILLED! if you haven't heard, the california supreme court has ruled that a law banning same-sex marriage is unconstitutional, stating that everyone has a fundamental right to marry.

the court's opinion said that any law that discriminates on the basis of sexual orientation will from this point on be constitutionally suspect in california in the same way as laws that discriminate by race or gender, making the state's high court the first in the nation to adopt such a stringent standard.

"Our state now recognizes that an individual's capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual's sexual orientation," Chief Justice Ronald M. George wrote for the majority. "An individual's sexual orientation -- like a person's race or gender -- does not constitute a legitimate basis upon which to deny or withhold legal rights."

thank you! this seems like such an obvious thing to me. your race or gender does not affect your ability to love or parent. are heterosexual couples really more suited for marriage? why should britney spears or pamela anderson be allowed to marry when a couple who has been together for 30 years is not? it doesn't make sense! let people be happy!


this photo just makes me cry. this is del martin, 83, and phyllis lyon, 79. in 2004, when san francisco issued marriage licenses to same-sex couples (they were later revoked), they were the first couple to be married. they had been together for 51-years. can you imagine waiting 51 years to marry the person that you loved? it breaks my heart. it's simply not right.

so i am so thrilled that the california supreme court made the statements that they did & made the decision that they did. i really really hope that this decision stands and that other state will follow suit. it's overdue.

in related news, ellen degeneres announced that she will be marrying her long-time girlfriend portia de rossi. congratulations, ellen!

wedded nerd

i can't wait to be able to wear this button. :D

from buttonempire

did i mention that i'm excited?

can i just say how excited i am about everything? first of all, i am really excited about the wedding itself. i'm looking forward to seeing everything we've been planning come together, to having our families meet each other, to having our friends with us, and to the food(!). then there are the brand new shiny rings we get to wear and of course, the honeymoon!

more importantly though, i am so excited about marrying danny and about our life and our future. i'm excited about saying our vows to each other with our friends and family there to support us. i'm even excited (well, more excited than not) about changing my name and sharing a last name. i'm excited about the cities we'll visit, the places we'll live, and the experiences & challenges we'll go through together. i'm excited about one day having a baby and sharing that experience (calm down, everyone, that is years away).

i could go on, but i think you get the point... i'm pretty excited. :)